Wrapping Up

The last couple weeks have been a bit of blur as we wrapped things up and got ready to head back to California. On the list, preparing our new living space, packing up our current residence, moving our things over to our new digs, and cleaning! It’s amazing how many things you accumulate in a year even when you don’t think you’re buying much; moving clothes, toys, books, kitchen and pantry items, took way more trips than I had expected.

Will definitely miss this view from our bedroom window.

I have loved our house this last year. We were staying there out of the generosity of Marc’s brother and thus the time had come for them to need to rent it. Totally understandable. So Marc’s parents offered us their apartment under their house. Although not as modern or full of light, it is only 5 minutes away (in Thonon), offers us a 3^rd bedroom (yea, office!) and a second bathroom, and still within walking distance (albeit a bit longer) to the lake. All in all a totally good option and best of all it’s still FREE. Kind of essential when both of us don't have salaried jobs yet.

The kicker though is nobody has lived in the apartment for over 10 years and the kitchen was without any appliances. So….Marc got to work, bought us a fridge, oven, dishwasher, sink, and induction stove top and then had to install everything and remodel a bit to make it all fit. Thank you Marc! 

He also brightened up the office for me with a fresh coat of white paint and a new beautiful desk. We got a bunk bed for the girls, did a major cleaning, and started moving everything offer. We’re still not sure what we’re bringing back from the US and didn’t have time to actually put anything away. So the place won’t totally be able to be put together until we return.

Sadie, our amazing chicken, will be vacationing this summer at Chez Veyrat, our lovely friends who have agreed to house her with their 3 other hens while we’re away. We brought her over a few days before we left. They have an incredible fenced in property plus a really cool homemade coop, equipped with an awesome perching tree limb. She quickly took to the coop, started pecking around right away, apparently unstressed. When we left though the other hens had returned to the coop and were nesting inside while Sadie was still outside. She would walk up the ramp to the nests and then stop before the door. When we looked inside, all 3 hens were perched above the entrance and staring at here; giving her what can only be described as the chicken equivalent of a "snake-eye". Apparently hens are not always very hospitable to newcomers. Thankfully when I checked in with my friend a couple days later, Sadie had already been welcomed inside the house and had even laid an egg (a good sign that she’s not stressed). She pecks around the property and surprised everyone when she meandered into their house. She regularly comes into our house and will even perch under the table while we’re working. I guess "normal" chickens don’t do that because they were totally surprised when she started cruising around and exploring their house. In all the time they've had chickens, none of them have ever come into their house. Ha! I love our Sadie Hen.

She recently got adventurous enough to navigate the stairs to see what the girls bedroom was all about.

I guess not all chickens are as curious as our Sadie.

Mamie agreed to care for the fish while we’re gone. In case you forgot, these are the fish the girls won at the Fair after we first arrived. Amazingly Bubbles and Luna are still going strong and they totally engage with us too. Do all fish do that? I had no idea. We keep them on the kitchen counter and whenever we’re around they watch us and swim toward us. When they see us first thing in the morning I swear they wiggle their tails like dogs and practically jump out of the bowl to greet us. Okay I know they want their food but still…..fish?!

Amidst all this I continued to work and the girls wrapped up their year at school. We actually are leaving before the official end of school so they’re missing the last 3 weeks. In honor of their American students this year the principal decided to host an English Day at school before the end of the year and moved it up to accommodate our departure. The Thursday before we left I volunteered along with several other parents at the school who speak English and we had an all-English morning. It was so much fun! It was the first time I got to do something with the girls’ school and that’s something I definitely miss. In California I would get to be in the classroom at least a couple times a month. I read English books to the kids with another woman I’ve become friends with over the year. We used simple books that we could quiz the kids vocabulary with; colors, animals, days of the week. Eric Carle’s “The Very Hungry Caterpillar” and “Brown Bear, Brown Bear What Do You See” were perfect for the task. The kids loved them and they actually knew a lot more English than I expected. I think Lola and Teah were especially happy to not only have their mama at school but to also “show off” their English skills a bit. Finally something that was easy for them.

Although the children in France start learning English as early as 1^st grade, it’s focused on basic vocabulary and not a consistent part of the curriculum. I’m learning that many of the children (who can afford to) take extra English lessons outside of school. By middle school English is one of the main classes all the students take and this holds true all the way through high school. English is actually even one of the subjects every student is tested on before graduating from high school! In middle school they pick a 2^nd language and some students will even choose a 3^rd language in high school!! I love this. To think that by the time the girls graduate high school they will have English, French, and at least a working knowledge of 1 or 2 more languages is incredible! I wish we emphasized language like this in the US.

To reflect a bit on how the girls are doing in school at this point. Although they’re still working on growing their vocabulary, their French is spot on! In 10 months they have truly been able to adopt a 2^nd language. Their teachers were incredibly pleased with both of their progress. And I am amazed to see how quickly they adapted. I recognize that it was incredibly stressful on them in the beginning and I only hope the initial trauma won't require therapy at some point but they now have a mastery of a 2nd language!! This was not only our primary goal of coming to France for the year but really a gift I so wanted to give to them.

The teachers’ though are a bit concerned about them being in California for 2 months and losing some of what they’ve worked so hard to acquire. Our task is to keep speaking French with them (especially Marc) and to do some French homework every day. Although they have both caught up quite a bit, they started the year not at the equivalent French grade level. Teah actually skipped a grade and moved into 1^st where she would have been doing Kindergarten at home. Needless to say they still have some catching up to do in order to start the next year at grade level. So, daily French homework has been added to our list of everything else we need to accomplish while in California this summer.

Getting in some pool time at Tonton's before we head out.

Enjoying an evening at the lake and celebrating what's to come.

We wrap up one chapter to embark on the next. Now to focus on packaging up our life in California to start anew in France. So much easier said than done. More on that to come.

Milestones

Significant milestones are upon us. For Marc, he just celebrated a milestone birthday, his 50th! And for us as a family our year in France is coming to an end and we are about to embark on a whole new adventure. Merriam-Webster defines milestone as "a significant point in development". Our year in France has definitely been that for us.

First, let's celebrate Marc and his first 50 years! Leading up to his big birthday I kept probing what he wanted to do to mark the momentous occasion. In true Marc fashion, nothing fancy. In his view he felt like this whole year away had been his real 50th gift. I would have to agree although I still felt like his birthday required a proper celebration. Without any movement from Marc I decided to take his birthday into my own hands. Side note here, I did throw a surprise party for him for his 40th birthday but that was in the U.S. where I actually had a strong grasp of the common language. Trying to throw a surprise party in France felt insurmountable. So while Marc was away for a few days (I'll speak to that later) I gathered the troops (aka Marc's brother and Valerie). I really wanted to mark the occasion by gathering his family, his old friends, and the new friends that we've made since being here. I had an idea for a location but didn't even know where to start. Thankfully Olivier and Valerie were on board and willing to help me navigate the French.

In less than 2 weeks we successfully reserved the cellar of a Brasserie in town, decided on a menu, texted, emailed, and phoned everyone, and amazingly everyone was free and able to attend! We decided on the cover of Olivier wanting to take Marc out to dinner for his birthday and the wheels were set in motion. The most amazing part of all of this was the fact that Lola and Teah actually knew what we were planning and somehow we're able to keep it to themselves up until the very moment of surprise as we entered the restaurant and everyone greeted Marc with a loud Joyeux Anniversaire!

I wasn't kidding. It was really in the cellar!

New friends!

And old friends! 

Plus family! Marc with Valerie's parents.

Marc with his Mama and Papa.

And with his brother's godparents.

Proof that there were kids there. Ha! They pretty much roamed between outside and the room adjacent to the cellar which had yummy treats for them. Can't say any of us were very aware of what they were up to. Good thing they made good choices. ;-)

Olivier decided to get behind the bar to play DJ and bartender.

Yes. Those are grown adults doing "The Dab". 

Let's just say this was towards the end of the night.  ;-)

Marc and his brother!

I can't speak directly for Marc here but as many people approach their 50th birthdays I imagine there's often an itch that needs scratching. That moment at the middle of your life where you're even more reflective and perhaps antsier than usual. How it's expressed varies dramatically for everyone. We don't have the money to buy Marc a Porsche and thankfully he's not looking to trade out his wife for a younger model (it probably helps that I'm already younger than him ;-) ) but that doesn't mean he's still not looking for some change, which brings us to the topic of our year abroad.

If you've been following my rambles since the beginning of our adventure you might recall that we had 3 goals for our year in France -- to learn French, connect with family, and re-focus our future. We've definitely succeeded in the first 2 goals. The girls French at this point is almost as good as their English. They've far outpaced me and now when I don't understand what someone is saying I can generally go to Lola for a translation. We've also had such a lovely time with Marc's family and all of us, including the girls, feel much closer to them now. So much so, that Lola expressed to me not too long ago how hard it was going to be for her to leave her family and new friends. She so wisely reflected to me that now wherever she is she's going to be missing somebody. So true!

The 3rd goal of re-focusing our future is a bit harder. Of course re-focusing is never very easy. Change is hard and just taking the leap to leave everything we knew and loved to come here for a year was definitely not easy. Now making decisions that will effect our forseeable future, even harder. But having the space, time, and perspective to actually think through the different options has been really helpful and has allowed us to approach these decisions with much more intention.

Our life in California, specifically Marin County, is beautiful. We literally live in an amazingly beautiful place, with a truly special school, and the best friends anyone could hope to have accumulated at this point in their life. Our home, although modest and definitely in need of more TLC, is where both of our daughters were born and where we laid our dog to rest. I have a job that inspires, challenges, and motivates me to be a better Dietitian. And although not living in the exact same region, I'm within driving distance of my sister and parents and feel blessed that we're all so close and visit each other regularly. I truly never imagined a scenario where I would even consider leaving all of this behind. But with much reflection and meditation that is exactly what we've decided to do.

Our year in France has given us a truly different perspective on what a balanced life could look like. Although everything I just listed about our life in California sounds idyllic it comes at a cost. Actually a very high cost. In order for us to make the money required to live in such a place Marc and I work a lot; long hours with often times long commutes. Ever since our girls were born we've relied on nannies and babysitters to help us care for them; to pick them up from school, to feed them dinner, and get them ready for bed. And unfortunately Marc's work was requiring him to work longer and longer hours, including many weekends, while being paid less and less.

After having almost a full year away from this; away from the long hours away from home, away from rarely having dinner together, away from the financial stresses, and away from a babysitter spending more time with our kids than we did, it became almost impossible for us to consider going back to that. The idea of stepping right back into the stress and chaos was not what we wanted to get out of our year away. In many ways this year away has reminded us what matters most and although we still care deeply about our work and chosen professions we care even more about the health of our family and the time we have to devote to it.

In France we have been able to imagine a new life here. Still geographically beautiful yet with a more balanced perspective to life. A lower cost of living and a cultural appreciation for family and time away from work. There are still some real challenges facing us and of course the grass is not always greener. But weighing all the pros and cons this feels like the best decision for us at this point in time.

So........I guess the French Remedy is transitioning from a blog about taking a year to re-focus and connect to a blog about what it means to move and live abroad. I will continue to write and share all the ups and downs of what it actually means to start over in a new country. I hope it will continue to inspire and entertain you and I hope you will continue to follow along with our crazy adventures.